Hiwatari Humiliation
by Lamanth
Summary: ONE SHOT – Take one Kai Hiwatari, add liberal amounts of vodka, plus one camera phone, mix well and you get…?


**Disclaimer:** I don't own Beyblade or any of its characters, merchandise, TV rights, ect… (I think you get the point.)

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Summery 

ONE SHOT – Take one Kai Hiwatari, add liberal amounts of vodka, plus one camera phone, mix well and you get….?

Like all of my work this is just something that happened to float through the empty void inside my head. Like it or hate it please R and R as honest opinions are always welcomed, as are random acts of worship.

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Lamb: My somewhat pathetic attempt at writing humour, it's not something I'm any good at just so you know what you're getting into.

**Muse:** Writing in general isn't something you're good at, but that's never stopped you before.

_Dedi:_ Gee, don't hold back, tell us what you really think. Anyway this fic is dedicated to **Iluvbeyblade**; even though Lamb said she couldn't have a dedication, she is cus Lamb just can't stay mad with her and she did beta read this. So **Iluvbeyblade** this is for us.

Lamb: As always sorry for any bad spelling and if you feel the need to throw things at me please wait until I've hidden behind the sofa kay!?

M**use: **On with the fic!

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_I've just had my first drink of the morning,_

_And so far I don't feel that bad at all,_

_But by 10 o'clock tonight,_

_It's gonna be a different story,_

_And come midnight, it won't matter anymore,_

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**Hiwatari Humiliation**

Blearily, Kai stared up from his position on the floor. His back ached from where he was propped against a kitchen cupboard, the doorknob of which was pressing painfully into his spine. Not that he was in any state to notice such a thing, and not that he would have cared even if he did. His legs were spread out in front of him, giving him the look of a gymnast who had been involved in a tragic accident while trying to perform the splits.

But the thing that struck Kai the most was the fact that a group of giants towered around him. "Have I shrunk, or have you all just grown very tall?"

The group of _giants _exchanged looks which some how managed to combine, interest, confusion, disgust, and the fact that this just might be the most entertaining thing that had happened all year. And even if it wasn't it was certainly the most unexpected.

"I've shrunk haven't I?" His voice was a piteous wail as he waved the empty vodka bottle around dejectedly like a didactic baby. All Hilary, Max, Ming-Ming and Tala could was look on incredulously at the improbable scene.

"I've shrunk and I'm drunk as a skunk!" Tala sniggered, as he looked on the pathetic sight of his almost paralytic captain. If only he'd had his camera with him, he thought ruefully, the blackmail potential of this would be phenomenal. Only then did he turn his head and catch sight of the camera phone that Ming-Ming was pointing in Kai's direction.

_Excellent_.

"Yes it's alright now. You'll be better when you had some sleep," Hilary said, bending down and looking at his flushed face before signaling for Max and Tala to help pick him up. "Just come on with us Mr. Skunk."

"I'm not a skunk!" Kai fixed her with an intent, albeit rather unsteady, gaze. "I'm a mole and I live in a hole."

That proved to be too much for Max who became almost hysterical with laughter, until he was almost hyperventilating and tears of mirth were rolling down his cheeks. Unfocused crimson orbs looked soulfully up at the convulsing blond teen. "How can you laugh at me? You don't love me anymore Maxy? Nobody loves me."

"Nobody loves me, everybody hates me, I think I'll go and eat worms…"

The acoustics of the kitchen did nothing to help improve anyone's voice at the best of times, never mind the wailing sound that sounded like a cross between a cat being strangled and a pissed-off banshee. While it was true that even on his best days Kai couldn't have carried a tune in a bucket, he had good lungs and in his current condition thought he could carry a tune.

Hilary did her best to soothe Kai, not that he was having any of it, and snapped at Tala when he suggested that braking Kai's jaw might put an end to all their suffering. Max had by that point collapsed onto the floor; his laughter so intense that it was by then almost silent and Ming-Ming was shaking so much from suppressed giggles that she could barely point her phone at the carnage. In the midst of all this Kai continued to warble happily, using the empty vodka bottle to conduct an imaginary orchestra.

--

Kai's first thought when he managed to drag his mind from the blissfully silent dark depths of unconsciousness, was that at least he was alive. Swiftly followed by wishing his wasn't as his head roared and pounded like a freight train. After a swift mental check, which certifies that he did have the right amount of limbs even if his head felt like it might fall off if he tried to move. His teeth felt as if they had dissolved onto his tongue during the night, his throat was raw and scratched and his sinuses felt as if they were on fire.

The drumming in his skull alone was enough to make the idea of sleep a non-starter but he could also hear the sounds of people sniggering and giggling coming from across the hall. It was a sound that, in his hung-over condition, echoed in Kai's head like a knife being dragged across exposed nerves. Stumbling from his bed Kai managed to make it to the room's door without his legs giving out on him, yank it open and somehow made it across the hallway so he could stand – lean - in the doorway of the office.

Ming-Ming was sitting in the swivel chair in front of the computer, her hands resting lightly on the keyboard, a wide grin lighting up her cute baby face every time she giggled, which she was doing a lot. Tala was half leaning over her, his hands holding onto the back of her chair to help keep his balance as he somehow managed to lounge while standing up. It was he who was doing the sniggering. Both turned to stare as Kai approved in the doorway.

Two sets of eyes slowly trailed up and down Kai's body taking in every detail. From the black boxer shorts, the only item of clothing he was warring. The still slightly glazed bloodshot eyes, which made it look as if the natural crimson colour of his eyes was leaking. Unruly, tousled, bed head hair, the contrasting two tones doing nothing to get rid of the impression of a startled hedgehog that had just had a run-in with an electric socket. And finally … the snarl of barely suppressed fury that was twisting his lips.

Turing from Kai, Ming-Ming raised her head until her eyes met Tala's. One azure brow flicked up slightly in an unvoiced question and was greeted with a small nod from the redhead. Kai watched the interplay, unmoved, and continued to glare at the duo. "What the fu-"

"Now!" Kai's furious question was cut off by Tala's command, and he was almost sent flying as the redhead bolted through the doorway pulling Ming-Ming after him.

For a moment Kai debated going after the two of them but swiftly decided better of it, they were gone and that was the main thing and in his fragile condition he didn't think he wanted to risk walking in on them a second time. Turning for the door, he reflected grumpily that he had been lucky that they had only been on the computer, at which point a moving image on said computer screen caught his eye. Moving for a closer look, Kai recognised the web site immediately as YouTube, but it was the title emblazoned above the small video window that had him sinking shakily into the computer chair.

**Hiwatari Humiliation**

In a horrified daze Kai sat staring at the screen as the events of last night which due to the amount of alcohol, among other substances he inflicted on his body, had wiped from his mind were being broadcast to a world-wide audience. It was all there, every excruciatingly embarrassing detail. From him claiming to be a small underground dwelling rodent. To singing, or at least attempting to sing, about living on a diet of earthworms and to the delight of fangirls everywhere, the sight of him being stripped to his boxer shorts and being put to bed by a trio - Max had been left in a giggling heap on the kitchen floor - of laughing friends, though he used the term lightly. And the whole thing ended with him trying to serenade the trio with a rendition of 'My Heart Will Go On' the love song from Titanic.

Icy sweat rolled down Kai's spine, as a combination of rage, fear and humiliation filled him. The view count was already on 76,469 and the video had only been posted, at the earliest eight hours ago, as soon as he had been put into his bed. The video had been posted on Ming-Ming's account so there was no way for him to take it down, and even if he could there would probably be dozens of copies by now.

Closing the window, Kai rose from the chair and made his way back to his room. As he flopped down on top of his bed he swore that he would make Tala and Ming-Ming pay for what they had done, and pay in a way that would be neither pleasant nor pretty. And also one that hopefully didn't require him to leave the confines of his bedroom, as he had every intention of staying within its four walls for the foreseeable future, at least until people forgot about that damned video.

The next fifty years should just about cover it, he thought morosely.

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Lamb: Well there you have it. Me trying to be funny and I still managed to be a complete bitch to our wonderful, long suffering Kai.

**Muse:** But you're just a bitch to everyone anyway.

_Dedi:_ I think it's the company she keeps, but anyway **Iluvbeyblade** we hope you liked it.

Please R and R I'd love to know what you thought.

Big luv see ya

Lamanth


End file.
